Feeling Stressed about Back to School and Food Allergies? Try This!

My kids are staying up too late, sun kissed and loving life as our summer days roll on.  But, I know it’s coming, soon it will be back to school.  Part of me craves the routine and structure our school days bring, but part of me is already feeling very anxious about the new year because, well, food allergies add an insane wrinkle to the start of a school year- new teachers, new classrooms, new friends…will they get it?  I can easily start to spiral into a swirl of negative thoughts about the upcoming year which can lead to me being all stressed out and not able to focus on what is front of me- the fun of summer.  But, I have found a simple solution for managing this stress!

I have recently started listening to a number of wellness focused podcasts, part of an effort to help with my own stress management, about food allergies and life in general.  I had to share a strategy I recently picked up that is intended for mindfulness and to help refocus your attention so negative thoughts don’t take over.  I was at the gym as I listened to the podcast so I didn’t have a pen to write down the author of the blog that was being narrated (more on this great podcast soon) but the idea is so simple and genius and I think can help us all out as we navigate the stressful waters of back to school with food allergies. 

The concept is this- get a bracelet, any bracelet.  It could even be a hair tie or rubber band if that is all you can grab.  Put it in your wrist.  When you feel yourself starting to stress out about back to school, you know the worry, the what ifs- mindfully take the bracelet and switch it to your other wrist.  As you switch the bracelet, think of the things you are doing to keep your child safe- the meetings you will have with staff, the gear you will send to school, the confidence you are building in your child that will allow him to advocate for himself.  As you switch your bracelet and your thoughts, you regain control and start to think about the positive steps you are taking to keep your child safe rather than letting the what ifs get you down. 

There may be days you switch that bracelet multiple times, especially on days when bad food allergy news fills your Facebook feed or a back to school night looms, but you can control your thoughts and the simple mindful act of switching your bracelet can help put you in a better place to not only manage some of the inevitable food allergy stress that comes with a new school year, but allowing you to stay focused on the summer fun at hand and not the what ifs of the Fall. 

I am wearing my bracelet now – it felt strange at first, but I am finding it really does help me re-center and stop thoughts that would otherwise spiral out of control.  Some days I switch it a lot, others the bracelet just fades into my look and no one really knows the purpose it serves.  But, it is a constant reminder to me that we can thrive on with food allergies!

I encourage you to try it out too and share your experience!  Does it work for you?  We would love to hear! 

And, let me tell you about this awesome podcast.  I posted yesterday on my Facebook page about it- Optimal Daily Living. Each and every day, Justin, the host of the podcast, reads from the best blogs and books all focused on mindfulness, minimalism and living your most optimal life.  I have found so many amazing strategies for managing stress, focusing on what is important and reframing my view of life and managing food allergies.  I encourage everyone to check it out! 

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Learn more about Tami and her company, Thrive On Consulting, which provides food allergy coaching and training.  You can also follow her on Facebook for tips to Thrive On with food allergies.

Back to school means back to the cafeteria for lunch, and if you have a child with food allergies this is undoubtedly one of the most stressful parts of going back to school.  When my cell phone rings near my daughter’s lunch hour, I always have a little pang of anxiety as I check my caller ID. 

We have elected to have my daughter eat at the peanut free table for yet another year, a personal choice for our family, and have a plan in place with her teacher and the cafeteria team to manage her allergies at this critical school day period.  No matter where you choose to have your child sit, having a plan in place with the food service team is essential. 

To help with that plan, I talked to Lisa Musician, owner of Food Allergy Dietician, and author of the new book, Parenting a Positive Reaction.  In her book, she discusses multiple strategies for thriving on at school and keeping your child safe and included. 

Here is her great advice on keeping lunchtime safe and inclusive:

1. Before you meet with the school to create your child’s plan, talk to your child to get a feel for where he or she would like to eat lunch. Perhaps your child is uncomfortable eating in a large area, such as the cafeteria, and would prefer to eat with a teacher.
2. Next, meet with the school foodservice director and work with the school cafeteria staff to ensure that your child receives safe meals if you decide to have your child eat school lunches. The food service staff and lunch monitors play an important role on the food allergy management team and should attend all meetings on the topic. If attendance is not possible, a separate meeting should be scheduled to review the plan.
3. Introduce your child to the head kitchen supervisor or director and create a system in which your child will be identified.  Some schools require these students to name themselves to lunch staff or have lunch tickets that are coded as a way of notifying the staff that they have a food allergy.

   Consider the following ideas for lunch when creating a plan:

• Seating: Discuss the possibility of designated tables in the cafeteria for students with dietary restrictions. Your child may feel more comfortable eating in a classroom with a teacher, in the nurse’s office, or in the principal’s office. Assess your child’s needs and review the options that are best for your child. Discuss all the possibilities with your child so he or she feels vested in the process.
• Lunch buddies (sign-up sheet): If it is important for your child not to eat alone, perhaps a sign-up sheet could be posted in the cafeteria or classroom to have other students eat at a designated table with the requirement that all lunches be free of the requested allergens. 
• Hand washing policy: Washing hands before and after eating is good hygiene and helps to reduce the risk of a possible reaction from outside sources.

Such great advice!  Personally, we have implemented the buddy system with my daughter.  We met with her teacher at the beginning of the year to talk about how important it is that my daughter has a friend join her at the peanut free table each day.  Through partnership with her teacher, my daughter identifies a friend with a safe lunch each morning and that person joins her later that day for lunch.  Much to my surprise, sitting at the peanut free table with my daughter has become a “hot ticket” and she usually has more than one friend asking to sit with her- makes a food allergy mama’s heart smile!

Take the time now, if you haven’t already, to reach out to your teacher and food service team to ensure you have a plan in place to help your child Thrive On and enjoy their lunch, in whatever way keeps them safe and makes them feel included.

Thrive On!


Get the book and learn more about Lisa:
Get more great school safe strategies from Lisa!  You can purchase her book on Amazon.  You can also learn more about Lisa by visiting her website or following her on Facebook and Twitter.

Thrive On with Food Allergies:
Learn more about Tami and her company, Thrive On Consulting, which provides food allergy coaching and training.  You can also follow her on Facebook for tips to Thrive On with food allergies.

Product Disclaimer:

Thrive On Consulting was not paid to promote this product.  Products mentioned here are provided as ideas and suggestions to help you Thrive On with food allergies.

Food Allergy Anxiety and School: Tips to Thrive On

The new school year is upon us and for families with food allergies this can be an especially stressful time as we work to once again educate teachers, administrators and school staff about how to keep our children safe.  For me personally, this is one of the worst times of the year as I worry about how things will be managed. I can feel my anxiety rise as we get closer to the start of school.  I try to actively manage my anxiety so that my daughter enters school excited and feeling safe, but this is no easy task!

We are still early in our school years, but I know that managing food allergy anxiety- at this time of year and throughout the year- will be critical for our family to Thrive On with food allergies. 

To get some answers on managing food allergy anxiety I interviewed Dr. Jeanne Herzog of Summit Psychology Clinic.  Dr. Herzog is one of only a few psychologists nationwide who specializes in food allergy anxiety management.  She has worked with numerous patients with food allergies, presented on food allergy anxiety at the national level and was a featured webinar presenter on this topic for FARE.   She will also be speaking at the FARE Teen Summit later this year.

Dr. Herzog shares some wonderful insight into how to recognize and manage food allergy related anxiety for both parents and children, as well we strategies to discuss with your school to assist in managing anxiety.  I hope that you will learn as much as I did from Dr. Herzog!

What are signs that your child might be experiencing food allergy related anxiety at school?

Kids and teens with food allergy related anxiety can express it in obvious ways or in more discreet ways.

Obvious ways:

• Talking often about their worries
•  Asking often about safe foods and safety precautions
• Appearing scared or saying they're scared to go to school
• Calling home often from school with worries about their food allergies
• Crying, isolating, refusing to eat at school 

Less obvious ways:

• Increased complaints of stomach aches, headaches, other illnesses
• Excuses to isolate or choosing not to participate in school functions
• Unexplained academic or homework issues
• Peer relationships seem to change
• Moodiness, including sadness, anger, easily frustrated
• Change in eating habits, controlling behaviors

What can you do before school starts to alleviate some food allergy anxiety for your child?

If your child is attending the same school as the year before, the level of anxiety is likely to be lower, especially if the child felt safe last year.  However, even a new classroom or teacher or new classmates can increase that anxiety.  Summer is a time when a child may find comfort in being able to rely on parents to keep them safe.  It is best to, again, prepare a child to be an advocate for their own safety (age related) during school hours, when parents are not there, by rehearsing the emergency care plan and the plans provided for them at school.  It may help to meet with the new teacher in the new classroom and go over the emergency care plan and accommodations prior to school starting. 

If your child is attending a new school (moving, transitioning to middle school or high school, etc.) the change can be anxiety-provoking for both child and parent.  Parent and child should prepare together by making arrangements with the school regarding safety, the emergency care plan and any accommodations required. If there is any way to find out if any other child entering the school also has food allergies, this can reduce anxiety as there is truth to "safety in numbers." 

Kids (and parents) feel less anxious when they know that people care.  When those around them know and care about the dangers and follow rules to make the school safe, children living with food allergies feel safe, calm and more confident in their ability to keep themselves safe.  This also connects them to the school in a positive way, which contributes to a child's academic achievement and self-esteem. 

Any preparation that widens the circle of people in your child's life who care will be helpful in reducing anxiety.  

Is there anything in particular you should communicate to school staff regarding food allergy anxiety so they can assist in managing it throughout the year?

Much is communicated about physical health and safety, which is primary, but often little is talked about regarding how the food allergy makes a child "feel" emotionally, especially in terms of keeping safe at school.  I think administrators and teachers (as well as parents of kids without food allergies) are starting to do a good job in some schools to show that they take food allergy safety seriously and that they care.  But, many are unaware of how anxiety plays a part in the life of a child with food allergies (and the parents). 

If your child tends to be anxious about food allergies, it's best to share this with appropriate school staff so that they can watch for signs and together you can come up with strategies that can help your child.  School staff should be taught that each child with food allergies utilizes a small amount of anxiety in order to be diligent and cautious.  And, it is common for some children to become even more anxious when they cannot control the environment with diligence - for instance when others around them are eating food containing their allergen.  Children also commonly feel anxiety about how living with a food allergy affects their social world.  Sometimes they worry about being "left out." 

As a parent, what strategies can be employed to help manage our own anxiety around sending our child to school with a food allergy?

Managing anxiety so that parents and children continue to be diligent and cautious, but still allow themselves to enjoy life and relax, is crucial.  A parent who does a good job of managing anxiety in themselves sets a good example for the child.  There are many ways to manage anxiety.

Having a plan to manage anxiety is critical.  This should include accepting the challenge bravely and proactively working to educate your child and those who care for your child.  However, it is also critical to maintain balance and find identity outside of your life with food allergies.  It is also important to adopt strategies to allow you to calm your mind and your body when anxiety occurs.  Some examples include:

• Think about what you CAN do, instead of what you CAN'T do.
• Since anxiety is about fear of loss of control, rehearse the things over which you DO have control.
• Rehearse the things that are consistent and predictable in your environment.
• Remind yourself that every day we are working on normalizing an environment for those with food allergies.
• Name the people who "understand" and care about your allergy.
• Calm your body using: gentle touch, relaxation exercises, belly breathing (sit or lie comfortably, relax your shoulders and chest, inhale to the bottom of your lungs, which causes your diaphragm to push your belly out, exhale while pulling your belly back in, breathe slowly for 1-3 minutes while focusing  on each breath sound.)
• Get your body moving with a walk, activities, play and sports.
• Play, play, play!
• Ask for a hug from someone you trust.

When should you seek professional help for food allergy anxiety?

When your anxiety or your child's anxiety seems to be affecting physical health or is seriously interfering with functioning or happiness please seek professional help.  One can also seek the help of a professional before anxiety increases so that a child or parent can get coaching on how to manage emotions and situations as they arise. 

When you and your child have a relationship with a therapist who understands the possible anxiety and stressors of living with food allergies, that therapist can become a great resource for managing the emotions related to the various transitions in a child's life - school, friends, dating, adulthood, etc. 

Click here to learn more about Dr. Herzog.

Click here to view the FARE webinar featuring Dr. Herzog for more great information on managing food allergy anxiety.

If you find this post helpful learn more about Tami and her company, Thrive On Consulting, which helps families and individuals managing food allergies, and follow her on Facebook and Twitter